I was thinking the other day as I was telling a good friend of mine how I did with my surgery, that I really should write that down. It’s not often that you find people who are willing to laugh at themselves, but I am one of them. The truth is that I needed surgery on my hands, but probably not at the same time as I have found out. Not only do you have to depend on someone for food, well lets just say everything and leave it at that shall we?
Some things are better left Unspoken!
My journey started on February 21. I got up, got ready and made my way to St. Mary’s hospital to have surgery on both of my hands. Yep! you heard that right, hand(s) as in both of my hands. I know what you’re thinking and on the backside of this thing I totally agree with you! I would never have done it had I really considered the ramifications of doing so.
My surgery evidently went really well with no complications unless of course my doctor is not telling me something which I probably don’t want to know now. If he’s hiding anything, it’s best kept hidden, after all I was sleeping like a baby anything could have happened.
Once my recovery period was up the nurse and my hubby got me ready to go home. The fun began in earnest. I had to get dressed without the use of hands, I had to get out of bed to do that, without the use of my hands until finally exhausted, starving and hung over I’m loaded or rather plopped into a wheel chair. As I’m in the wheel chair heading for the door and home sweet home, my only thought was survival until at last my home I see! There wasn’t anything spiritual about it nor mystical either. I was ready to go home, as in mine with a nice comfortable bed and a relaxing cup of coffee. Aye chihuahua, what was I thinking? As we made our way past all the looky loos in the various waiting rooms we came to the emergency room door and there in all it’s 4×4 glory was our Chevrolet truck. Bring on the final challenge; 1)to get me up in that huge 4×4 with a raised suspension. 2) without the use of hands 3) getting up I realized it would be without the use of my jelly filled legs as well 4) All in front of a fun filled gathering audience.
So here I am facing my own Goliath (shh don’t tell Jack I called his truck Goliath), the exception being this one rolls on wheels and the real Goliath did not. After struggling not to use my hands, I began doing a wave offering before the Lord, meaning both hands were waving in the air looking like a worship service gone crazy charismatic. I must have looked a sight trying to hold those heavy things straight up in the air! I bet if someone had had their smart phone and filmed the dumb blond, it would have made a You tube hit. I can hear the narrator now…Look at that ditsy blond trying to get up in that truck. She must be drunk…no, no wait folks, she’s got something on her arms, what has she done to her arms? She looks like mini R2D2 on steroids or something…. They wouldn’t have known that both arms were in braces past my elbows with two slings holding them down and in the process effectively cutting off my windpipe. I was struggling to breath all the while my benefactors are trying shove me up and in the truck. I’m sure there must be a manual somewhere telling how to lift heavy loads in the cab, right? Not that I’m all that heavy but I mean anyone that just left surgery is either flying higher than a kite on painkillers or they are like me, so sleepy I can’t keep my eyes open much less get my jelly filled legs to lift myself up! I’m sure that hindsight is 20/20 right about now for my hubby. He’s thinking I should have brought the Prius! Somehow they finally got me up in the truck and we are on our way home. you cannot imagine my relief when I realized that getting out of the truck wasn’t going to be nearly as bad nor near as much drama. At the time appointed I just leaned over and fell out and prayed for my hubby to catch me lol! Which he did and love lives on!
At the house I found a whole set of new challenges. I just wanted to lay down, which I realized sorrowfully I cannot do of course. Two braces with two slings could combine to kill me by asphyxiation. (On a serious note; I have a whole new respect for people who have lost their arms and can use their feet or mouth to keep functioning.) Never again will I take for granted that I have hands. Needless to say I found out real quick exactly what I can do without hands & what I can’t do. On the scales of justice doing nothing won out over doing anything. I mean anything. I could not even feed myself. The greatest heartache to me was that I could not have a
cup of coffee. This is the stuff of nightmares I tell you. At this point I would have taken a liquid IV of the stuff. Straight up black at that. I love my hubby with all my heart and I trust him completely, but there is no way I was letting him help me drink steaming hot coffee. It’s one thing to spill water or coke on yourself but a hot cup of coffee, no way! My faith only goes so far! Ha, ha!
I remember they had set a table up for me beside the recliner. It was convenient for them at first, it didn’t mean much too me because I couldn’t even get out of the chair without my hubby strong arming me up. Shortly my son realized I was home and came running through the room like Percy Jackson in the lightning thief. If you’ve seen the movie or read the books you know he had on a pair of sneakers that had wings on them. Jared was on his way to me when he caught that table with his foot sending my drink flying and my hand automatically reaching out to catch it. I had forgotten, due in part to the medicine making me sleepy, I can’t use my hands period because they are cut. So the moment my hand hits the table, I started screaming, my son ate dust off the floor and started screaming. Of course I tried to pick him up and I started screaming again. With tears running down my face trying to wipe (with hands I can’t use) the tears on my son’s face while my son is yelling his face hurt and I was screaming my hands hurt, my hubby comes through yelling, what happened? My son and I both sobbing in pain left my hubby in bewilderment because he hadn’t seen the greatest show on earth via reality living TV courtesy of his wife and son. This was only day 1. This was going to be a long, long recovery. I can say this, when all the boo, boos of the day were fixed (in my case medicated) and lessons were learned by all. Chiefly, no running in the house, even when you’re excited to see your momma! Definitely ponder the consequences of your actions. lol!
I will leave you here for now. I have many more stories to tell as I was out for 2 months… but I will leave you with my moral lesson.
My moral here is that laughter really is good medicine. Hind sight through my hubby’s eyes gave me a hysterical picture of flying children, a flapping wife with both arms in braces and slings and a drink that actually stayed on the table without spilling! I guess God looked down from Glory and called an angel to help me out! He is good that way! The things that seem insignificant to most are big deals to God and He is always watching out for His kiddos! As I re-write this a few months later I’m reminder just how much can be healed in such a short span of time.
Be blessed my friends with all the laughter you can drum up this day! A merry heart is and does good like a medicine Proverbs 17:22a
I’m Hid with Christ!
As I re-write this a few months later I’m reminder just how much can be healed in such a short span of time. No scar last forever, unless you allow it to by not letting it properly heal. You can’t escape the momentary pain of healing. However, you can speed the process along by counting your blessings; you survived to scar and your alive to tell about it still. The truth is, you are now better than you were then. Faithfully God walked every step of the way with you.